Australia is really a wonder place but in some ways it really bites. Perhaps I should say most creatures in Australia bite. I noticed when we arrived here that our host Darryl (a native Australian) would answer our questions about the danger of various animals with “Oh, yeah, that might give you a bit of a rash”. After some cross checking against some Australian animal guide books I was able to decipher this Australian code language regarding the danger of creatures here:

“Yeah, that’ll bite” = Reminder that you are looking at an Aussie creature
“A bit of a rash” = Will cause extreme swelling/bleeding and/or toxic reaction
“A rash” = Debilitating pain and persistent flu-like symptoms. You will wish you were dead. May include the loss of a limb.
“A nasty rash” = death

In the category of “That’ll bite” there is massive March fly (which you can find year round despite it’s name). If you swat a March Fly you will merely stun it briefly – you need to stomp it with your foot to really finish it off. There are smaller flies that bite as well, they are faster and more difficult to swat. Of course there are lots of mosquitoes – especially at night. Because of the number of small insects that bite I have noticed that I have taken a “swat first, ask questions later” approach to anything that tickles me during the night. Meta has been swatted several times.
I recently discovered that the rains encourage small leeches that reside in the wet grass. I gave two of them a ride to the house after clearing some brush.

The bites don’t hurt but they bleed profusely because they inject an anti-coagulant when they bite.

They are just as disgusting as you might imagine.

We were not bit by this giant centipede, but our host Bob almost was (I think it falls under the “nasty rash” category).

He found it hanging on his shirt in the laundry bin and brushed it away because he thought it was a stick. It is the largest centipede they have every seen, and even the neighbor who works for the Fish and Wildlife Department was amazed at its size. The dollar coin in the photo can be used to judge its size, although it was actually payment to help appease the centipede.
I am not convinced that they mosquitoes, march flies, biting ants, stinging nettle, bees and wasps really make it onto the “rash” scale. A Carpet Python, like the 6 foot specimen that found its way into the house through the antenna cable hole, will definitely give you a bit of a rash.

Australians are quick to point out that the Carpet Python is not poisonous (it is a constrictor) and that it will run away from you if you come towards it. This is not particularly comforting because one wonders about the poisonous snakes that will actually chase after you.
There are a few things around that are not at all dangerous – like the Cicada, a bug that often is bigger than a man’s thumb and has a call that is incredibly loud and piercing. They are not eve slightly cute and we almost crashed the car while removing one from Caleb’s foot (both kids were screaming bloody murder). The Duck-billed Platypus is quite cute and will mostly run away from you but has a stinger (causes “a rash”) that it will use if you corner it. Fruit bats (1000’s of them here, hanging in trees during the day)

are harmless, although noisy and a bit spooky. Gallahs, Cockatoos, Bower Birds, Magpies, Whip Birds, Parrots, Lorikeets, Kookaburra’s and other local birds have lovely songs and really give you that tropical feel. The tree frogs are Anna’s favorites – she catches them almost every day. There is one that lives behind a picture in the house – when it croaks the picture moves back and forth on the wall.
The Aussies actually think it is quite funny how freaked out we are about dangerous creatures (never mind that 10 out of the top 10 deadly snakes are in Australia). They point out that they don’t have any really big dangerous creatures (Kangaroos at up to 200 lbs, Wombats at 100 lbs and Emu’s at 150 lbs are all very docile) while we have things like Grizzly Bear (which will hunt you down) and Cougar (that attack hikers regularly) that have both size and ferocity. I guess you get used to whatever you have to deal with.